Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Foreshadowing...

So I was answering comments on my blog, and realized I still had an old draft sitting out there...alone and unread. Looked at the date and realized it was written 4 days before Brett told me that he was moving out...that, without a word or a shot at working things out, he was simply walking away from our 20 year marriage. And I was struck by my last couple sentences... "I'm learning, I guess. Life doesn't usually work exactly how we'd like it to, or think it should...but I guess you let yourself be maudlin...for a second! and then move on and make the best of it." ha! how's that for a nice bit of foreshadowing?! Thank goodness I already was thinking like that, huh?! It's been six months now...and I'm truly happier than I've been in years. And though I hate what the kids are going through right now, I do have to respect him for having the courage to do what I'd been wanting to for years. I have a couple friends going through some really tough times right now...and I just want to remind them that things happen for a reason and that you are never given more than you can handle. And that no matter how crappy things seem, you still have us...all your friends...who love you tremendously! And though sometimes it seems that fate is awfully heavy-handed in dealing with us, maybe it's because we're just too damn stubborn to do what needs to be done on our own!

End of Summer Blues



So today was the last day of summer for my kidlings. My daughter starts her first day of high school tomorrow. My boys are still at school right down the street from the house. They went to bed excited and a bit nervous. Reilly asked me when you stop feeling like that before new things and I'm not sure how much he appreciated me telling him that I still get those wriggly worms in my stomache before I do something new. Now they're finally asleep and I'm supposed to be loading the music for my back-to-back Xbiking classes tomorrow morning. Instead I have those same wriggly worms in my stomache, but it's because I feel guilty.In years past we always celebrate with something special. One last trip to the beach for them and our favorite fish tacos at Harbor Fish and Chips. Or going to see a movie, which we very seldom do. Or having friends over for a last fling. Today I taught smack dab at noon...and we had to pick up Katy's clarinet from school...last minute school supplies...a two hour meeting. We did go to the mall so Katy could buy the coveted checkerboard Vans for the first day of school and we gnoshed hardcore at Soup Plantation for an early dinner. So we did have a little treat, but nothing spectacular. What sucks - is that I KNEW today was going to be like this - so we went and saw Harry Potter 6 last Friday when Brett was actually home with us. But today was sort of anti-climatic. And I honestly don't know whether they are feeling gyped or not.So today was the last day of summer for my kidlings. Which means that tomorrow is the first day of school. Funny how one follows the other, huh?! Katy is set. Carpool is picking her up and she would absolutely die if I even entertained the idea of walking her into high school for the first day. But my boys are still my babies. And regardless of whether they might normally walk or ride their bikes to and from school, everyone knows it's a mandatory mom duty to take them the first day and embarrass them with pictures and generally make a nuisance of yourself. But tomorrow I can't. Our one instructor had knee surgery today and the other one has kids of her own. Not a lot of options. I'm praying that the entire population of Riverside County stays healthy tonight, so that Brett can get off half an hour early and do the honors. If not, the boys will be off to school alone on the first day. And that makes me sad.But I will wake up early in the morning and make them a kick-butt breakfast and give them big hugs and kisses and make sure Ian walks Reilly to his class if Daddy isn't there. Then Thursday morning, I'll be up bright and early to walk the boys to school - camera in hand - ready to get a picture or two with the teacher. I'm learning, I guess. Life doesn't usually work exactly how we'd like it to, or think it should...but I guess you let yourself be maudlin...for a second! and then move on and make the best of it. Tomorrow - bright and cheery me will be back. Tonight - thanks for listening to me ramble!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Post a Comment